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“How to Love One Another in the Family of God” (Part II)
Introduction: Sometimes the best illustration of biblical truth comes from the observation and mouths of children. There was a contest held asking young children to define Love. What does love mean? Here are some of their answers.
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."
"Love is what's in the room at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate."
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."
"Love is what's in the room at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate."
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, say it a lot. People forget."
The real purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said, “Nothing, I just helped him cry.”
In I Corinthians 16:14 we read, "Let all things be done with love." For a Christian there is no substitute or excuse for not LOVING our brothers and sisters in Christ. The reason for this love is found in the words of Romans 5:5, “…Because the LOVE OF GOD is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given unto us."We do not have to manufacture love. We only have to share the Love given by God through Christ.
In this our last message on “How to Treat One Another in the Family of God” we want to focus our attention on the spectrum of LOVE found in I Corinthians 13:1-13. Please understand as you read this chapter the word “Charity” is the word for “Love.”
“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. (2) And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. (3) And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing. (4) Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, (5) Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; (6) Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; (7) Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. (8) Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. (9) For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. (10) But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. (11) When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. (12) For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. (13) And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.”
In I Corinthians chapters 12, 13, & 14, Paul is dealing with the subject of “SPIRITUAL GIFTS.” A spiritual gift is a supernatural ability given to the believer by Christ through the Holy Spirit at the moment of his salvation. The purpose of each gift is to glorify God, Revelation 4:11 and to edify both the believers and the church, Ephesians 4:12-13. In these chapters, Paul in particular was dealing with the problem of the misuse and abuse of some of the gifts in the church.
In I Corinthians chapter 13, Paul is saying no matter how exciting and beneficial the “Spiritual Gifts” are to the church, THEY ARE USELESS UNLESS THEY ARE CROWNED AND COVERED IN LOVE.
I Corinthians chapter 13 was a REBUKE to the Corinthian church that was ransacked with carnality. Here was a church full of themselves.
They had created divisions in the church, 1:10.
They had perverted the doctrine of baptism, 1:11-17.
They were bragging about the human wisdom they had, 1:18-31.
They were carnal to the core, 3:1.
They had deceived themselves and defiled their bodies, 3:17-18.
They were puffed up, 4:18.
They were tolerating horrible immorality, 5:1.
They were suing each other in heathen courts, 6:1.
They were confused about marriage, 7:1.
They were making a mockery of the Lord’s Supper, 11:30.
They had corrupted the gifts of the spirit, especially tongues, chapter 14.
They were confused on the subject of the resurrection, chapter 15.
They had slacked off on their offerings, chapter 16.
Someone said, “If sins were horses, this church would be filled with many stables.” So, to a church full of itself, this love chapter was a rebuke to them.
I Corinthians chapter 13 could be called the HOLY SPIRIT CHAPTER. An evidence of the Holy Spirit in us is the FRUIT of LOVE. Galatians 5:22-23 tells us, "But the fruit of the Spirit is LOVE, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance…"
I Corinthians chapter 13 could be described as a PORTRAIT OF CHRIST. Someone said, "Paul is painting a portrait of love and Jesus Christ is sitting for the portrait. He lived out in perfection all of these virtues of love. This beautiful picture of love is a portrait of Him. And when we are living out these virtues of love we are showing the world the LOVE OF JESUS." This was Christ’s emphasis to the disciples on the eve of His crucifixion when He said in John 13: 34-35, "… By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."
I Corinthians chapter 13 has three parts. They are:
A. Verses 1-3, Love is ENRICHING,
B. Verses 4-8, Love is EDIFYING,
C. Verses 8-13, Love is ENDURING.
A. I CORINTHIANS 13:1-3 teaches us that LOVE IS ENRICHING. These verses focus on the EMPTINESS produced when LOVE is ABSENT.
Verse 1describes a person who PRODUCES nothing without LOVE, ““Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.”
Verse 2describes a person who IS nothing without LOVE, “And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.”
Verse 3describes a person who GAINS nothing without LOVE, “And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.”
In other words a ministry without LOVE is cheapened. It has been said, “Agape Love is the "CIRCULATORY SYSTEM' of the church.” The word LOVE in this chapter is the Greek word "AGAPE." In I John 4:10 we read, “Herein is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.” This is the Love of God.
"AGAPO" love is a love without emotion
"AGAPO" love is a love that is deliberate
"AGAPO" love is not a feeling, it is an ACT OF THE WILL.
"AGAPO" love is a love that loves regardless of the attraction of the object.
"AGAPO" love is a love that's PERSISTENT, PASSIONATE, IMPARTIAL, INEXHAUSTIBLE, UNCONDITIONAL and EVERLASTING.
“Real love is visible compassion in my heart to meet another's needs. Real love is putting skin over your Christianity.” The hymn “My Savior’s Love” expresses this love.
I stand amazed in the presence of Jesus of Nazarene,
And wonder how he could love me,
A sinner condemned unclean.
He took my sin and my sorrows;
He made them His very own;
He bore the burden to Calvary,
And suffered, and died alone.
How marvelous! how wonderful!
And my song shall ever be:
How marvelous! how wonderful!
Is my Savior’s love for me!
B. I CORINTHIANS 13:4-8 teaches us that LOVE IS EDIFYING. In these verses we are given fifteen spectrums of LOVE. In the original language each of these descriptive words are verbs. They do not focus on WHAT LOVE IS SO MUCH AS WHAT LOVE DOES AND DOES NOT DO. Agape LOVE is ACTIVE. It is not passive or abstract. For example:
Love does not feel patience, it practices patience.
Love does not feel kind, it practices kind things.
Love does not just recognize truth, it rejoices in truth.
The point to be made is:
Love is fully LOVE only when it is PRACTICED.
Real love is putting skin over your Christianity.
First: LOVE SUFFERETH LONG, verse 4.Love practices being PATIENT. Love is literally "LONG-TEMPERED." Love's patience is the ability to be inconvenienced or unfairly used over and over again and yet NOT BECOMING UPSET OR ANGRY. In the world in which this church existed, vengeance was a virtue:
You were to FIGHT BACK;
You were to STAND UP FOR YOUR RIGHTS;
You were to do whatever it took to GET EVEN.
However, in God's Word our primary concern is the welfare of others, even to the point of our willingness to be UNFAIRLY USED. In Romans 12:17-21 we read, “Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men. (18) If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men. (19) Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. (20) Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head. (21) Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.” Love refuses to PAY BACK EVIL FOR EVIL.
Remember, Jesus’ first words on the cross, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do."
Remember, Stephen's last words as he was being stoned to death, "Lord do not hold this sin against them."
Second: LOVE IS KIND, verse 4. Being KIND is the counterpart of being patient.
Patience puts up with a lot. Kindness gives out a lot.
Patience requires self-restraint. Kindness expresses sweetness and compassion.
Kindness is ACTIVE goodwill. It is generous. It works for the welfare of others. In Titus 3:4-5a we read that contrary to our sinful attitude and activities, God in His Kindness shows His mercy. “But after that the kindness and love of God our Saviour toward man appeared, (5) Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us…”
Third: LOVE ENVIETH NOT, verse 4. Another way of saying this is LOVE IS NOT JEALOUS. This is the first of eight negative descriptions of LOVE. Love and Jealousy DO NOT travel togetherWHERE THE ONE IS, THE OTHER CAN NOT BE.
One of the hardest battles a Christian must face is JEALOUSY. There will always be someone who is a little better. Proverbs 6:34 tells us, “For jealousy is the rage of man…” But a loving person is never JEALOUS. He is GLAD for the success of others, even if their success works against his own. In Philippians 2:3-4 we read, "Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others."
Fourth: LOVE VAUNTETH NOT ITSELF, verse 4. When Paul uses the word "VAUNTETH," he is saying LOVE DOES NOT BRAG.
Love does not BOAST of its SUCCESS.
Love does not parade its accomplishments, nor is it conceited.
Love does not seek to win the praise or the applause of others.
JEALOUSLY is a desire for what someone else has.
BRAGGING is trying to make others JEALOUS of what we have.
JEALOUSY puts others down, BRAGGING builds us up.
The Corinthian’s were SPIRITUAL SHOW-OFF'S! They were constantly vying for public attention. They cared nothing for harmony. Each did his own thing, in total disregard for what others were doing. This was the very opposite of the Lord Jesus who never BOASTED. In Philippians 2:6-8 we read of the humble submission of our Christ, “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: (6) Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: (7) But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: (8) And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.”
Fifth: LOVE IS NOT PUFFED-UP, verse 4. Another way of saying puffed-up is with the word ARROGANT. An ARROGANT person is one who is INFLATED WITH HIS OWN IMPORTANCE. The Corinthian’s were proud and arrogant about:
Their Spiritual Gifts,
Their Carnality,
Their Worldliness,
Their Immorally.
They were arrogant rather then repentant. They BRAGGED when they should have MOURNED. InProverbs 16:18 we are warned, "Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall." It has been said, “Arrogance is BIG-HEADED, whereas love is BIG-HEARTED!”
Sixth: DOES NOT BEHAVE INAPPROPRIATELY, verse 5. This refers to poor manners and RUDE living. Rude people do not care about others’ feelings or sensitivities. Christian rudeness is an offense to the unsaved who immediately turn-off the gospel. Love is gracious, not RUDE. It appears that everything the Corinthian’s did was rude and crude.
They were rude with each other by taking one another to court.
They were rude with one another at the Lords table.
They were rude in their worship. as they tried to out-talk each other.
Another way of saying this is "Love does not behave graciously, Love is gracious."
Seventh: LOVE SEEKETH NOT IT'S OWN, verse 5. In this statement is the idea of insisting on MY RIGHTS. To illustrate this, please notice the wording on these two contrasting tombstones:
Here lies a miser who lived for himself, and cared for nothing but gathering wealth.
Now where he is or how he fares nobody knows and nobody cares.
Sacred to the memory of General George Gordon
Who at all times and everywhere gave
His STRENGTH to the weak, His SUBSTANCE TO THE POOR,
His SYMPATHY to the SUFFERING, and His HEART to God.
The Corinthian’s were selfish to an extreme. They did not use their gifts to BUILD-UP the church. They used their gifts to BUILD-UP themselves.
Again in Philippians 2:4 we read love should not be preoccupied with its own things, but with the interests of others, “Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others." Jesus modeled this for us in the words from Matthew 20:26-28, “But it shall not be so among you: but whosoever will be great among you, let him be your minister; (27) And whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your servant: (28) Even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.” Jesus came to serve. He never sought His own welfare, but the welfare of others.
Others Lord, Yes others, let this my motto be
Help me to live for others, that I may live like Thee.
Eight: LOVE IS NOT PROVOKED, verse 5. The word provoked has to do with the idea of being "AROUSED TO ANGER" or "EASILY UPSET." Love is not bad-tempered. STOP! There is nothing wrong with anger against sin. We ought to be angry over unrighteousness. We should be angry over the things that ANGER GOD. However, it is wrong to get angry over having YOUR OWN WAY. On the other hand, Agape LOVE centers on the WELL BEING OF OTHERS.
Ninth: LOVE THINKETH NO EVIL, verse 5. In other words LOVE KEEPS NO RECORD OF WRONG SUFFERED: Love quenches wrong rather than recording it.
Now if God completely and permanently erases the record of our many sins against Him, then how much more should we forgive and forget the much lesser wrongs done against us? In Ephesians 4:32 we read "And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, FORGIVING one another, even as God, for Christ's sake, hath FORGIVEN you."
LOVE KEEPS NO BOOKS of RESENTMENT.
LOVE QUENCHES WRONG RATHER THEN RECORDING IT.
Tenth: LOVE DOES NOT REJOICE IN INIQUITY, verse 6. Love never brags about sin. Doing wrong is bad enough, but bragging about it makes that sin even worse.
Rejoicing in sin is the same as justifying the sin. We are making the wrong right. Isaiah 5:20 warns us, "Woe unto them who call evil, good and good evil…"
Rejoicing in sin is an affront to God. When we delight in SIN we are delighting in what OFFENDS and GRIEVES God. IF WE LOVE GOD, THEN WHAT OFFENDS HIM WILL OFFEND US.
Rejoicing in sin only promotes the sin and the wrongdoing. It allows sin to grow and develop which in turn will produce more harm and eventually death.
"Love does not delight in exposing the weakness and sins of others. Love will weep over sin and be brokenhearted over failures. Love will condemn sin, but love will always yearn to cover and protect those who fall.”
In I Peter 4:8 we read, “And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.”
ELEVEN: LOVE REJOICES IN THE TRUTH, verse 6. Having now gone through EIGHT negative areas, Paul gives us FIVE more positive aspects of LOVE. The first one is a contrast to the last. Instead of rejoicing in EVIL, we are to rejoice in the TRUTH. LOVE cannot compromise the truth. Love does not focus on the wrongs of others. Love does not parade another’s faults for the world to see. Rather, love LOOKS FOR THE GOOD, HOPES FOR THE GOOD, and EMPHASIZES THE GOOD. Someone said, "Love approaches the triumphs of ordinary folks. It's primary business is to build-up not to tear-down."
TWELVE: LOVE BEARS ALL THINGS, verse 7. The word "BEAR" is a building term, speaking of a roof. A roof is there for protection. In other words LOVE PROTECTS. Genuine love DOES NOT EXPOSE, GOSSIP nor LISTEN TO GOSSIP. Human nature takes pleasure in exposing others faults and failures.
LOVE does not EXPLOIT or GLOAT.
It B–E–A–R–S. It does not B–A–R–E.
In Proverbs 10:12 we read "Hatred stirreth up strife, but LOVE covereth all sins." Love does not justify or compromise sin nor does love broadcast sin. Instead, love warns, love corrects, love rebukes and love disciplines. Love feels the pain of those it loves who have fallen into sin and it helps to carry the burden of their heart.
THIRTEEN: LOVE BELIEVES ALL THINGS, verse7. Love is not suspicious. When love throws it's mantle over a wrong, love also believes in the best outcome: that the wrong will be CONFESSED and FORGIVEN and the loved one RESTORED to righteousness. Real love is willing to give the benefit of the doubt. Real love is willing to go the extra mile.
FOURTEEN: LOVE HOPETH FOR ALL THINGS, verse 7. Love does not stop loving. Even when belief in a loved one's goodness or repentance is shallow, LOVE STILL HOPES. Remember, as long as God's grace is operating, HUMAN FAILURE IS NEVER FINAL.
FIFTEEN: LOVE ENDURES ALL THINGS, verse 7. The word "ENDURE" is a military term which speaks of holding a vital position at all costs. LOVE holds fast to those it loves. In other words LOVE WILL NEVER STOP LOVING!
C. I Corinthians 13:8-13 teaches us that LOVE IS ENDURING. Would you notice the first words of verse 8, "Love never faileth…" This is a quality which should characterize every child of God in EVERY CIRCUMSTANCE, twenty-four hours a day, and seven days a week. This word “FAILETH” can be translated several different ways:
Love never falls to the ground. It never decays.
Love never loses its strength. It is inexhaustible.
Love never leaves its place. It is immovable.
Love will outlast everything.
All of us in one way or another live within the context of a family. Years ago I found this paraphrase of I Corinthians written in reference to the family. I repeat it to you in closing.
Though in the glamour of the public eye, I sway the emotions of man by oratory, or by my silver singing, or by my skillful playing, and then go home and gripe because supper is late, or because my clothes weren't made to suit me, I am become as sounding brass or tinkling cymbal.
And though I am able to impress others with my vast knowledge of the deep things of the Word of God, and though I am able to accomplish mighty things through faith, so that I become famous among men as a remover of mountains, and have not the love that reads the deep longings of the heart around the family circle and removes the barriers that grow up in shy and tender hearts, I am nothing.
And though in the glamour of public praise I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I win the name and fame of a martyr by giving my body to be burned, and yet close up like a clam at home, or behave like a snapping turtle, knowing nothing of the glory of giving myself in self-denying service to those nearest and dearest, it profited me nothing.
Love is never IMPATIENT, but KIND; love knows no JEALOUSY; love makes no PARADE, gives itself no AIRS.
Love is never RUDE, seeks not her OWN, nor FIGHTS for her own RIGHTS, is never RESENTFUL, never imagines that others are plotting EVIL against her.
Never broods over WRONGS; never exults over MISTAKES of others; but is truly gladdened by GOODNESS.
Love is the acid test of the truly yielded life, for in all other phases of Christian service there is a certain amount of glamour; but in the home one is confronted with the bare facts of life, stripped of all glamour. The home is given to help every Christian "not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think." And it is in the home that we have the privilege of demonstrating that the Christian life is "faith which worketh by love."
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If God has spoken to your heart after reading the sermon “How to Love One Another in the Family of God” (Part II) Right now, talk to God about what He has spoken to you.
Do you have the assurance that one day you will go to heaven? If you have no assurance that you know Jesus Christ, then I trust you will decide to accept Him as your personal Savior. The Bible tells us in
Acts 16:31, “…Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved…”
Romans 10:13, “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”
This prayer is here for those who need to ask Jesus to be their personal Savior: “I do want to go to Heaven. I know I am a sinner, and I do believe Jesus Christ died for me. I realize I cannot buy this great salvation, nor can I earn it. Knowing Jesus died on the cross and arose from the grave to pay my sin debt and to purchase my salvation, I do now trust Him as my Savior, and from this moment on I am completely depending on Him for my salvation.”
If you made the decision to accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior let me know? Please send an e-mail to, pdmikBBM@aol.com and I will send you some literature that will help you in your Christian life.
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In His Amazing Grace,
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